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Solace of the Shadows
Sunday, December 31, 2006
So it's a new year, and the quietest new year i've had in ages. Which is good, because i guess, like birthdays, i've always had my reservations with the significance of such days anyway.
I think the reason why i haven't been posting as much as i'd like sometimes boils down to several things. One of which is that i'm increasingly troubled by the realization that I seem to be losing grasp of the whole thought into words process. It is amazingly frustrating when a person loses his ability to communicate his thoughts to others, even in as simple a manner as possible. I can't even describe the feeling (which just substantiates my point), but such a loss is like losing a part of yourself. When you can't get others to understand you, then you start to wonder sometimes if what goes through your head sometimes is of any use to begin with.
Another random thought, sometimes I think that it may be inherent in people that we want to see others fail. It is a guilty thought, but also a self-affirming one which we subconciously try not to acknowledge. Which individual wants to see his replacement do a better job than he has? Who wants to see someone succeed more than the effort he has put in himself? We are all selfish, but to what degree. And I marvel at those who seem to selflessly appreciate the achievement of others with no hint of negativity in the least, at least on the surface. Hopefully, such creeping thoughts can be beaten away because it is certainly not something good.
I'm glad for things being the way they are right now. And i'm glad for Fatin, who has done so much for me it'd be ridiculous to attempt to describe just how. I only hope I can do likewise in time to come and beyond.
This has been a really random post, so here's some pictures from Vietnam, which was an awesome experience both as a trip and for a competition. On the last day of competition the Vietnamese got a bunch of the swimmers from the various countries hooked on playing Chap teh with them outside the pool, it was a simple yet highly amusing memory. I glad Fatin convinced me to go, because I realized that I won't be able to experience these things anymore. You don't get many more opportunities when you grow older, so just take 'em as they come.
ASEAN Uni Games Vietnam 2006 Pictures
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